Spine Intact, Some Creases

Spine Intact, Some Creases

by Victor J. Banis

reviewed by Mykola (Mick) Dementiuk

“Holding hands in the darkness at the movies could be an intensely erotic experience.”

I was maybe 15 or 16 years old and sneaking into various Times Square movie houses. Did it in through the back doors on 41^st or 40^th Streets, with someone leaving and me sneaking in; occasionally, I’d meet the brute of a man who simply refused to let me in and slammed the door after he left. But such a prim and proper disciplinarian was rare and I’d get in for free, most of times, with some hurrying-away movie viewer fading out of sight. I’d go in and watch a western or a war-entrenched movie and feel good afterwards. This was years before rampant sex tore through the area…And as I’d sit there, watching some battle with Japanese or Germans or some cowboys fleeing from the sheriff, I’d grow alert when someone sat down in a vacant seat next to mine. Mostly an older man, yet occasionally someone just a little older than I was; who was hoping and looking for some company…or so I thought.

These trysts never did go any further than mere holding hands and looking dreamily at each other, but after an hour or so I’d say, “Be right back…” and hurry off, pretending I was going to the bathroom or concession stand when really I was disappearing into the 42^nd Street crowds. I think maybe it was four or five times that happened and I’d leave, still erect, and wander my way home where I masturbated for weeks on end with that cowardly memory…Why did I run? Why was I so horny and hot after?

I often thought of those anonymous faces over the years, those tricked, led-on, abandoned and forgotten so despicably and shamefully, when a single line in Victor Banis’ book brought it all back, “holding hands in the darkness at the movies could be an intensely erotic experience…”

How many times did I pass by the theaters in my later years and remember holding hands, feeling myself protected and cared for when all of a sudden that old fear came back to and I so stupidly faded off in to the crowds? Too many, too many…way too many…

Victor J. Banis, whose bibliography at the end of the book is amazing, --and boy, the wealth of material he has produced under various names and guises is truly remarkable--has produced such a book, a book of memories and lost times gone forever with just a flicker of remembrance. And gratefully Victor Banis has done it all and tells us just how he came to do these things while playing a truly rich and rewarding life experience.

Banis explores the “loneliest of all minorities,” --being gay in the straight world-- in the 1950s and 1960s when such tumultuous change loomed on the horizon. Back in the 1920s and 30s he notes, one didn’t give much mind about one’s sex yet in the 40s one paid attention since everyone was horny and hungry for it. But by the 50s it was frowned upon and put down, with yellow journalist Walter Winchell calling “a vote for Adlai Stevenson is a vote for Christine Jorgenson” until it exploded in the 60s coming out all decorated in vibrant drag, so to speak, --in 1968 it erupted in a tirade of protest-full celebration that was to become Stonewall, never to be the same again.

Banis begins his biography by becoming a writer of gay stories that were published in Switzerland and then under various names in America. His fame, or ill-fame, grew until it exploded in a suit brought against him and his publisher by the US Post Office for obscene material, and this at a time when the government was after Henry Miller and Barney Rosset and others. The suit against Banis was gratefully dismissed, after they dragged it as long as they could and Banis, in need of a break from the stupidity that has always been a part of American history, got that break by traveling across Europe, and seeing and experiencing Sweden, Switzerland, Italy and Franco’s Spain.

Once back home, he did a book tour that took him across the country, meeting with Hugh Hefner and other stars in Beverly Hills, --Nina Foch, Elizabeth Montgomery, Natalie Wood, Linda Ronstadt amongst others. His neighbor at the time was Sal Mineo, who eventually was slain in a botched homosexual robbery.

But most of all was Banis’ writing; as he did it each and every day for 365 days a year then just started all over the next year and did it all over again…as he’s still doing it. Among the many books he has written (under his name) The Why Not, Longhorns, Angel Land, Lola Dances among others, and under various nom de plumes a wealth of titles, for male and female readers alike.

As a writer he is truly amazing! Plus for other writers who are still undergoing the process of slow learning he recommends “On Becoming a Novelist” and “Art of Fiction” by John Gardner as required reading (I would add William Zinsser’s “On Writing Well” also, it helped me.)

But most of all, Banis advises, write to suit yourself, in this way you’ll be able to write what you want and sleep well at night…and the hell with what they have to say against you…

A well-worthy book, instructive and filled with memories of people, from Hollywood stars and starlets, to those who wrote for them like Victor Banis, writer extraordinaire…

Read it, ponder it, learn and write…write…write…

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Hardup Janet

Hardup Janet

Janet was a pretty girl who had the ungainly name that could get her in trouble in those years:

Have you got a hardon? Not yet.

Are you gonna get one? You bet!

Who you gonna stick in? Janet.

How’s it gonna come out? All wet.

Sung by the whore house…Quartet…

We would laugh at her as Janet would fume and curse and spit out, “Idiot! Idiot!”

I was in the 8^th grade and lusting after every girl in school and out of it. Janet was in another school but this was NYC and even in a building where they lived kids went to school in

opposite directions. Sometimes I saw her come out of her building and head up 2^nd Avenue -- I always lusted after her, and I had the notion that she was doing the same.

One morning after jerking off, I walked past her building a little earlier, thinking I’d get her because she was ripe for sticking it in, or so the song did say…I kind of was sure she was the one who had inspired the song…

I entered the lobby -- the building was still sleeping, stretching out as if getting ready to go to work. What to do now? I thought. She has to come down the stairs and there I’d be, looking up her dress with my dick out ready for her mouth to gulp it down. God! Was I hard just thinking about that moment…I pulled my dick out.

Then I heard footsteps, high heeled ones I was sure, maybe with just a toe hold on each little shoe. Oh God, I slowly pulled my dick out and held it before me ready for her to descend the stairs….

A guy appeared at the top of the stairs and I heard him say, “What the fuck?!”

I was out of that building, running down the street as I was zippering up and trying to hold my school bag with the other hand. In no time was I on another street and spent the rest of the school day real pissed at my rotten luck….

I saw Janet a few days after that…I mouthed the song and laughed as she glared at me and disappeared down the street…

I still feel like an idiot…even now…

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Ukrainian Christmas

Ukrainian Christmas

Ukrainian Christmas fell on January 7^th unlike the American December 25^th. It was the old tradition our parents respected and adhered to, but more and more we began to follow the American routine.

Oleksandr had a thing for Sosya. He had gotten her a present, but what? We didn’t know, still we were sure that on Ukrainian Christmas he’d be standing with his gift before him. Needless to say, that Christmas Eve, on the last of a school day, she thought he was jerk and tossed his gift the trash from which Oleksandr retrieved it and skulked away.

It happened like this: January 7^th fell on a Friday that year and though we had off from school we still had to show up for Holy Mass that day. It was nice having the rest of the day for gift-giving and family visiting. But smirkingly, we all had our eyes peeled for Oleksandr and Sosya.

Sosya was already there, sitting patiently in the girl’s section, when Oleksandr walked in and trod to the boy’s section in church. Their pews were filled with students and mass begun, was celebrated, and came to an end. Everybody was getting up and leaving the church when Oleksandr’s voice rang out, “Xryctoc razdayetsha!” Christ is born!

People stopped in their place and looked at each other, then smiled, greeted each other and went on with what they were doing. But Oleksandr did not wait for Sosya, he disappeared in the crowd of people leaving the church.

Weird, but Oleksandr left Sosya alone after that, not buying her gifts anymore.

Do people change that suddenly? Overnight?

Guess they do…

###

Fat Sonia

Fat Sonia

Sonia was a fat girl whom everyone made fun off, how she dressed, how she walked, how she ran….

I don’t know how she got me hard but the possibility she could be the one made me gentler in my approach to her. I stopped laughing at her and actually began to be somewhat defensive when the guys started taunting her, which of course turned the laughter onto me.

“Hey Kolya”, they’d taunt, “Your girl friend is looking for you!” as their smirking and hooting began to make me feel embarrassed and mad at them.

“Fuck you!” I’d spit out defensively to get away from their insults, which I’m certain Sonia was seeing too.

One day, after the usual name calling I was getting from my so-called friends, I turned the corner on Avenue A and there was Sonia standing in a doorway of a building and looking at me; I knew it wasn’t her home -- she lived a few more blocks by the river -- and I turned red from seeing her.

“What’s your game, mister?” she said, frowning at me. “Why are you so nice?”

I suppose after all these weeks I answered, “I don’t know, I guess I like you.” And again I blushed and felt very uncomfortable.

Her glaring face lightened and she faintly smiled at me. And for a moment we liked each other and I smiled back…when I saw her eyes look over my head and again she frowned.

“Idiot jerk!” she spat out. “Get away from me! Stop following me!”

I heard laughter and spun around to see a few of my old friends laughing.

“Hey, Kolya, you like fatsos, don’t you?” they’d laugh. “Let’s see if she can lay down next to you? Hell, she can’t even stand up!”

But by then Sonia had stormed off as the laughter echoed after her but I wonder if for a moment before they appeared Sonia wouldn’t take a chance and get friendly with me…aw, hell I’ll never know….

###

Nighborhood Fag

Neighborhood Fag

Vinnie lived in the neighborhood and it was clear what he was, a fag, that the kids taunted and made fun of him as he skipped by on the streets. But the taunting was good natured and it was interesting how red and embarrassed I’d turn as we all called after him “Faggot!” then run away down the street, laughing and teasing each other to go back to him.

Vinnie was a hairdresser who ran his business from his apartment, just one flight up the stairs. Many older women paid him a call and his place was always packed with women gossiping and waiting their turns to get preened over.

I had heard he’d pay an easy five bucks for just sitting there as he’d blow you but I never knew a guy who did that; at least no one admitted that they did it. I sure was glad that no one saw how hard I had gotten, as they’d laugh and smirk over how much money Vinnie would give them.

Hell, but five dollars? I said to myself, intrigued over the easy money I could get. I wasn’t getting that nowhere else, that’s for sure.

I knew Vinnie took off on Saturday afternoons -- learned this from the guys -- so at 3pm I was standing in the outside doorway next to his, watching a woman leave his house; I knew that this was a customer, her hair was expertly made up that it looked like she was going out for the night, dancing and drinking…or something, but defiantly screwing..

I smoked two more cigarettes -- that should have given him enough time -- and entered his building.

The smell of perfume and hairspray was prevalent with each step I took up and neared his door. But the smell of women who had been there made my approach more enticing and alluring. My dick was hard and eager and if I just concentrated on that, how women smell, I’m sure I would let him suck and kiss me all night long, as long as my eyes would be kept closed. If I can’t see what he’s doing than it ain’t happening, right?

I listened; faint music hummed through the door which only added to the sexual tension I was feeling. I gently knocked on the door, waited an instant then knocked again, louder and firmer. I heard gentle footsteps shuffling to the door -- I thought of things feminine. The door opened…

Vinnie stood in a robe; his face creamed and adorned with makeup, something I had never seen a man in before and for a moment was surprised.

“Oh, my,” he said, all flustered. “But I can’t do you now, sweetie,” looking me up and down, but he gushed, “I’m waiting for my beau.” And he winked at me. “Come back another time, sweetie, like tomorrow, late afternoon.”

There was nothing to do but shrug and turn around and head back down…

But I still recall the scent of perfumes that were prevalent through the hall as I passed through the door and went back outside…

A pity I never dared to go back…

###

Staten Island Fairy

Staten Island Fairy

I had wandered into the Ferry Terminal in my usual walks through the city. I was supposed to meet Olena in the Village but again she didn’t show up. I was pissed and found myself walking downtown. I had no idea where I was going but the walk was very pleasant and interesting. The buildings, the stores, the people were all new to me and I just walked on, heedless of where I was going.

I knew NY was surrounded by water and many times as I walked glimpsed docks and ports on my way until I came to the tip of Manhattan. But the place was peopled by crowds rushing inside of a terminal. The signs read Staten Island Ferry, so I shrugged, threw in a dime into the turnstile and found myself on the deck of a huge ferry boat.

Damn, where was I going? I wondered.

I took a seat with the rest of the crowd, as they read newspapers, but it got quickly boring so I stood up and walked around the deck. Wandered from end to end all around the boat and found myself going into the bathroom to pee. One guy stood at the urinals but he didn’t look at me so I unzipped and pulled my penis out. Ah, it felt good, peering on water as the ferry churned along…

I heard movement and out of the corner of my eye saw the guy moving away from the urinals he had been standing at. I shook my dick a few times and turned around. The guy was standing, leaning back against the sink, his dick out of his pants and hard as hell. I watched him pull the skin back…And strangely I blushed, but didn’t know why, and I felt my own dick begin to harden in my jeans. Again I saw the guy’s penis bounce up and down as he stood there and licked his lips. I stared at the dick as if fascinated then shook my head, turned and walked out of the bathroom. Outside I found a seat but far away from the bathroom…

I didn’t see the man when the boat docked on Staten Island but I turned about and took the next boat back…I quickly found the bathroom and held my stiff penis before the urinal. I heard someone enter…my face was very red…

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Handjob Time

Handjob Time

Sitting in the back of the Sheridan it was too crowded so we sat up front, with our heads aimed still higher to see the picture that was playing -- a dumb Jerry Lewis comedy crap -- but we weren’t interested in that, we came here with one purpose in mind…

Olena to my left as we started making-out and feeling each other, and what I like about these movie theater kissing and hugging was feeling her up her skirt and getting a glimpse and touch of nylons and silk and frail little stuff...And the way my hand was probing up her skirt, inching higher up her hose and feeling the garter straps having shifted about her spread legs, I wanted to push even further but her panties were in my way.

And Olena used to act like she was a little girl victim, her lips pouting, her sighs deeper, her legs spreading, until she spasmed and pushed me off, like she hadn’t known someone might be watching, her face red and nervously looking about to catch an eye of an surprised observer. I think she’d be looking to show off more…

And of course I’d be left with a frustrating hard-on that had no sense of going down…until one day after she had orgasmed or cummed or whatever you call female spasming, and then sat looking around and lit a cigarette, blowing out her smoke but saw my dick was still hard and eager so she reached for it and started jerking me off as she sat there puffing on her cigarette and boringly looking at Jerry Lewis again made a fool of himself.

It didn’t take long, the thrill, the emotion, the lust, the heat, the openness of sex all combined together and made me spurt out my jism in an explosion of madness and peace. I felt as I was in heaven at that moment, like I had been blessed with being a son of God that had just ascended into his throne into Heaven…and all just from sexually cuming.

“Jesus!” I heard her flare-up. “Right in my hand!”

I had spurted out and the jism rose up her fingers and to her hand reaching up to her elbow…like beautiful pastilles draping her tender skin…and she was mad as all hell!

“Disgusting!” she said again. “That’s gross!” then she stormed off, I guess to the ladies room to wash her sticky hand off, but I didn’t care. Anyway, she didn’t come back; I waited, thought about her, then just shrugged and lit another cigarette. Hey, it wasn’t bad, I thought, about time she did it to me anyway.

Jerry Lewis appeared again and was funnier as I looked up, laughing at the movie…Ha Ha! What a laugh!...But Olena stayed away….

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